05/31/2026

Happy Sunday World! as we reach the end of the month I would like to take a reflection on all that has happened. This last month I moved cities to return to my hometown. Living with family at my age, while not uncommon, came as a sort of defeat. Defeat of pride, defeat of identity, and defeat of potentials in my old city. However defeat is not the end, rather another step. One of many, all infinity possible but all ultimatnly nonexistance. I was sad to loss a sense of independence that I had come accustomed to. And Living with family has it's obvious drawbacks, lack of privacy, need for accomidating of others, and sharing of resources and responsibilities. At time I've felt subtle expectations from my family, as anyone would. And to round it off, I felt disgusted. But that was where I was and not where I am. Now I can say I am much more at peace with this transition, and even more so I am confident in what is to come. I've let go of old identiy and expectations and instead adopted a new subtle formlessness. I'm still very much me, but much less so. I am the same friend to all. I am still the same hot-headed, opinionated, contrarian smart-ass I have always been. But all across, less so. This may mean nothing and to me somedays it felt like that. But today, it means so much more. I'm full of faults and I've made mistakes and will make many many more, it comes with the contrarian smart-ass attitude. But MORE in its place I see kindness, gentleness, Joy inspite of awkwardness. Forgiveness to myself where it was never found. Peace in a storm that had destroyed me. The same storm that brought me to famialr waters and holds all of us in my country. It doesn't scare me, it fills me with vision for the future. I'm happy to see old friends and wish nothing more than to see them more. But I also want to make new friends, meet new people. Learn many new things. Any man who tells you "I know the absolute truth" is either a liar and should be ignored, or a fool, and equally ignored. not shunned that I would have previously believed, not corrected as so many would like to believe. But simply ignored. Attention is the fuel of our modern society. and it is not on us to look away from the bad, but to ignore those who would distract. Focus is needed today more than ever. I see this to be true. and while I don't know what the absolute truths of reality are, (for no man truly can) I can see with my eyes systems at work that which do not serve those many claim they can/should/do. Instead I see curoption, misunderstandings, and just close mindedness. I will continue to worry, as is human. Worrieness comes from care. But I will not be dishearten. I will not seek out a division but rather seek out the context of this division in the first place.

I'm optimistic for what tomorrow brings. My only resonsibility is to seek it with joy and intent. Luck is simply being in the right place at the right time. and if that means putting myself in many places at many different times, then I would believe that to be sound logic. I do not know what the absolute truth is, but science has taught me that sound theory is built on repeat testing. So at the very least, I must try over and over again.